Conversations with my father

Hello father,

In an effort to continue the preexisting assumption of my being a snarky bugger, I have corrected your e-mail for some flaws I saw fit to point out and through which improve both you and me as users of the English language.

Good evening young man,

I have just booked and paid for your Amtrak ticket for 12:15pm  on the 22nd of Dec for your winter break. You are committed at this point as there will be a 50% penalty if you cancel. I think that once you have done this trip you will know if it is a viable option in the future. I did enjoy train travel when I was younger in England and you might enjoy this trip. All I would have to say to you is don’t be late for the bus, once you’re(not your) on the bus you will be fine and on the train, be careful of your belongings as I would hate to see you get ripped off while sleeping( This is not a proper sentence as your list lacks an and or any indication of ending withstanding your lack of a colon list). You are allowed two bags of less than 50lb’s.

We will figure out something for your return. I will probably drive you back and I am sure that your mother will want to come regardless of what is going on with your sister that day.

I do love and miss you son and can only hope that you enjoy school and you’re(not your) able to settle in and roll your sleeves(not selves) up and get the grades that both you and I know that you’re (not your)capable of. I do wish you the best in this life (this life? Since when did you believe in reincarnation Dad?) . Party hard, work hard and please don’t lose(not loose, this isn’t Youtube) sight of why you’re(not your) there. Keep in mind that they are paying you $5000 a month (More than I am making recently, actually almost twice as much) just for the privilege of being there.

Sorry for being such a Dad as you do need to know that I do have all the faith in the world in you as you are and always have been a great guy.

I will not wax on poetically as I know your eyes are probably already rolling in the back of your head. When I call you and you call back hours later, why is it that you always have to go? (two sentences) Can you not find a few minutes of your time to talk to your dear old Dad?(not period) There are things I would like to talk to you about without your Mom being around and when you call at night at home, that is not possible.

Anyway, see you on the 22nd. I do look forward to it.

Take care.

Corrections aside I love you very much as well Dad. I miss you and home and mom and Mayuko and everything in Pleasant Hill, College Park High School aside. I can’t wait till the 22nd. Thank you very much for purchasing the ticket and I hope that I will enjoy train rides as much as you did when you were younger.


Your lovingly annoying prodigal progeny.

P.S. I told my friend that your favorite movie was Trainspotting so we watched it together. The movie in itself provokes some conversations that you and I must have someday as to why in fact that reminds you of England so much.


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